4 hari...

Pejam celik pejam celik dah 4 hari arwah Tok tinggalkan kami..pelik, entah kenapa kehilang itu kurang terasa..masih terasa yang arwah Tok masih ada bersama kami..cuma tidak nampak di penglihatan..
mungkin sebab kenaifan diri sendiri yang belum bersedia menerima kenyataan..org putih kata..stage of denial..tak mungkin plak, sebab semasa hari pengkebumian, air mata mudah benar tertumpah..dua biji mata ni sendiri menjadi saksi jenazah tok dimasukkan liang lahat..bukan setakat itu saje, dua tangan ini juga turut memandikan jenazah..bersama2 kelima-lima anak arwah Tok, sepupu Mama & kakak saya sendiri..

Ya, pengalaman itu cukup memberi makna buat diri saya..itu pengalaman pertama saya..sebab tu, saya musti coretkan di sini sebagai tanda kenang-kenangan....kalau dulu, saya sgt takut berhadapan dengan jenazah, inikan pula nak memandikan..tapi kali ni, buat sekian kalinya..bila melibatkan nenek sendiri, dengan sendirinya saya mengofferkan diri utk membantu..biarlah jenazah arwah Tok, hanya kami anak beranak yang melihatnya sewaktu dimandikan..bak kata ustazah, jenazah pun punya rasa malu..

Tidak terlintas langsung rasa takut atau seram semasa menyentuh anggota tubuh arwah Tok..saya hanya memakai sebelah sahaja sarung tangan, sejujurnya saya lebih selesa menyentuh jenazah tanpa berlapik. Walaupun peranan saya hanya dibahagian kaki, itu memberi pengalaman yang cukup besar bagi saya..Saya tabik spring Mama..sebab die yang banyak mengoffer diri nak amik bahagian yang penting semasa memandikan jenazah..Mama yang membasuh najis jenazah yang terakhir, mama yang amikkan wuduk arwah Tok yang terakhir..saya menanam azam yang sama andai satu hari nanti giliran saya pula yang perlu memandikan jenazah ibu sendiri..(tak dpt nak dibayangkan andai waktu itu tiba..belum tahu saya mampu lakukannya atau tidak..sebak)..dan jugak saya harap, anak2 saya bakal melaksanakan yang sama andai satu hari saya mengambil tempat di atas pelantar itu..

Semasa dikafankan, saya hanya berpeluang sebagai pemerhati..saya tenung wajah arwah Tok lama2 dan saya sgt yakin..pandangan saya itu benar..arwah Tok tersenyum..sungguh manis..sungguh tenang..saya pasti dia telah menemui ketenangan yang hakiki..saya pasti arwah Tok tak lagi merasai kesakitan yang selama ini terpaksa ditanggungnya..dan saya sangat lega kerana arwah Tok tidak lagi terseksa..sungguh! Saat yang paling menyentuh hati saya..sewaktu saya mencium arwah Tok..air mata tak terus meluncur sejurus selepas ciuman saya berikan..baru saya terasa dahinya sgt2 sejuk..dan sungguh wangi.

Perjalanan ke tanah perkuburan diiringan rintik2 hujan yang halus..cuaca jugak mendung..cukup nyaman dan tidak panas terik..menurut Pakcik, jenazahnya sangat2 ringan semasa dimasukkan ke liang lahat..Alhamdulillah, semua urusan berjalan lancar..mungkin itu satu petanda baik yang arwah ditempat di kalangan mereka yang beriman dan disayangi Allah..mudah-mudahan..amiin..

7.7.11

As Salam to all,

Been away for few days..due to a reason..

Our beloved grandma left us to meet the Almighty on 7.7.11 officially on 11.44 pm. I got to jot it down here for my remembrance..as this is among the significant event in our family.

Honestly, I am glad that she had finally found the peace she had been looking for rather than continuously suffering from various complication. I believe that's the best journey Allah has been crafting for her..

It all started when she fell down at my aunt's house that causes her to suffer from broken femur. And from there, her health condition deteriorated slowly, and after been bed ridden or 19 days in Hospital Serdang, she left us with all her beloved children witnessing her departure..I heard it was a smooth ones and I always keep my prayers for her to be in the best position di sisi Allah..

We had three nights in a row tahlil from Friday nite to yesterday nite..Alhamdulillah everything went smooth. As the saying, ada rahmat di sebalik setiap kejadian..and I couldn't agree more..this incident has brought us, her children and grandchildren even more closer..cause we shared the same foundation..we love her for what she was..and we will always love her forever..

Al-Fatihah to arwah Tok..Jariah binti Othman..

4 main reasons people stay back after office hour

I remembered few years back, my first boss shared with us the reasons why people stay back after office hour and asked us which one suit us most? Lets see what they are:

1. To please their bosses
I guess memang ada org yang jenis cegini, I would say this people are really good actor..hahah..Ya la, purak purak buat keje lepas opis but in reality..of course not! Just for the sake to get credit from the bosses who believe in people who stay back are the perform ones..hmm..think about it..

2.  Poor time management
What I meant here is that, they did not fully utilise their office hour to complete their work, but rather spend so much time gossiping, bual2 kosong dan sewaktu dengannye..so in the end, keje tak siap, then realise oh my god my dateline is very2 near, so end up got to stay back..ramai tak yang cegini?

3.  Work overload
Well, cannot be denied some of us are overload with office work! Yes, especially when people see you as capable person, so most of the time they will let you do even supposed to be their work! Arggh..tensi tensi..but ada jugak yang mmg keje die banyak, because they love to do it, so this one kire not so bad la kan, because sendiri yang rela..:D

4. Take advantage of office's Internet connection
Ahaaa..what say you? Most of the offices I would say would block access to facebook or twitter during office hour, but unblock them after that..<well as for my company yes, this is the practise> So people decided to stay back to check on their facebook, twitter etc since there's no internet connection at home. Why bother to go the cyber cafe when you have access in office in front of you kan? Hmm..maybe now dah tak ramai stay back due to this reason, kan dah ada Unifi kat umah? Hik hik

So..which of the above describe you best? Me? ehehe..biarla rahsia..cewaaah..

To be honest, I seldom stay back now that I moved to new division. Unlike for the past 9 years, I would say 80% of the time I got to stay back..for the reasons of workload! Hihi..dedikasi gitu..it was really tiring, and I remembered there are times (byk kali ok..) that I neglected my hubby and kids, but in return I did not get the recognition that I should have gotten. Life is not fair isn't it? Memang pun, only in thereafter you will be judged fairly..so again..bersabarlah..

So for that reason, I decided I got to slow down and change my focus towards my family..they matter most to me more than anything else now..and Alhamdulillah..after a lot of prayers, asking for Allah's guidance, am here at the new division..which does not require me to stay back most of the time. Once in a while, yea I do stay back for datelines. Other than that, if they are not so urgent, I would just do my work at home..

Life have got to be balance you see..not just between office and at home, but also to see from the perspective of dunia and akhirat. I'm jotting down here as a reminder to myself..

10th Anniversary..

Our marriage anniversary? No..no..hihi..guess what? It's my tenth anniversary as an employee in this company..Very2 loyal indeed huh? Yup..being the loyal type, have not think about leaving this company as yet..to be honest, that has never cross my mind..now you got be agreed with me..am the very2 loyal type huh? hihihi..

This company has done more than just giving me this permanent job..because of this company, I have been able to further my study until I got my degree! TQ so much! I got to admit that I do love this company..tho not everything is sweet here..hihihi...biasa la kan...

I guess it's too significant that I got to jot it down here, as my remembrance later on..Oh by the way, the 10th anniversary was actually on last 2 July..how could I not remember to jot it down that soon eh? Hihii..Anyway, the thoughts that count right?

I remembered last 10 years, we were discussing the reasons why our company chose 2 July as the effective date of our employment..The speculation among us was because we would not be eligible for bonus the next year..we were supposed to complete at least 6 months to be eligible..hihii..well2 that was during our youngster time..I still dunno whether it is true..but one thing for sure..2 July 2001 was on Monday..:D

Patience

Is something that I'm really2 weak at..really..seriously..be it at work or at home, I just have no patience. To me, it's still ok to have lack of patience when it comes to completing my work..haha..that shows sense of urgency..isn't it?..but it's really2 not good when I have no patience with my kids..:(

I found it really2 difficult to control my patience especially with my daughter..dunno why..maybe because we are very2 much alike..poor kakak..tho she's the eldest, she is actually the most manja one..even her teacher said so..pelik, hubby on the other hand, is less patience with our first son, but he's very2 patience indeed with kakak. So most of the time, he'll handle kakak, and me will handle abang.

This morning, I lost my patience again with her..:(. Mana taknye, almost every morning, weekdays mind you..she'll cry when we woke her up..it took her 45 minutes to get ready for school, from taking her bath until completing subuh prayers and wearing her uniform.This morning, the bus driver, a makcik pot pet pot pet to her because she got to wait for kakak wearing her shoes less than a minute! Makcik ni pun satu!

However, alhamdulillah, I found it very2 easy to wake her up for Subuh prayer during the weekend. Alhamdulillah, guess this is more important isn't it? Benarlah, anak2 ini adalah ujian Allah..like it or not asz, you got to be patient..plizz..remember what Ustaz told you, we are living in this world temporarily, sekejap je..kalo ada rezeki 50 years..tak lama..only in thereafter, you'll be living there forever..jadi bersabarlah..

Peristiwa di McD

Last2 Saturday, we had our lunch at McD..that week, dunno why, was too lazy to cook, even when was weekend..maybe because I got bored with my own cooking..hahah..ooh how I miss my mom’s cooking very2 much! Ooopss, melalut sudah..that’s not the point I want to share here..

My intention is to jot down what happened in McD while we were having our lunch. For my little kiddo Aisy, the fries will do..oh by the way, we love McD fries especially when we shaked them with the bbq flavor! Nyum nyum! It’s all because of the MSG..not healthy..not healthy..but Aisy is save from those..he just had his original fries without the salt! Alamak..melalut lagik..hik hik hik

Oh..what happened? My little Aisy was eating his fries like this

 
Hihihi..dah kenyang, cegitu le gayanya..and then..

Eh eh..what were you doing son? I realized..he was staring to a little baby girl, also on the baby chair at the other side of the room..and then he gave that girl a boyish smile..

OooOooo…sudah pandai anak teruna mama ni ye..ngorat nampak..then I continued observing him..

Aik..berfikir plak..what were you thinking son? Hahaha

Haa..kan dah shy-shy cat tu..

Gotcha! Ngorat anak dara org lagik!

Malaysia vs Chinese Taipei/Taiwan

Aduii..sakit jantung sungguh tengok perlawanan bola kelayakan Olimpik ni..As usual, suami terchenta mmg duduk terpacak depan tv dari tadi..me as normal, yg mmg tak minat bola, tgk gitu2 jek..semangat jugak nak sokong negara kita, tp adoii aii...ini la yg daku dapat..sakit jantung..hahahahah

Tinggal satu minit saje lagik..tp nampak gaya Malaysia bole menang ni..yeehaaa..tp agak kecewa dgn cara dieorg main..baik sgt asyik kasik chance kat pasukan lawan sampai hambik ko..3 gol bolos! Yg tak bestnye..sebab panalti...

Yeaa...akhirnya tamat permainan..Taiwan - 3 Malaysia -2. So Malaysia layak ke peringkat seterusnya sebab dari segi agregate kite menang sebab lebih byk skor di tempat lawan! Alhamdulillah..kerana penangan bola ni, hubby sanggup tangguh solat isyak jemaah mlm ni..sungguh tak bagus kan kan? Saya sebagai makmum tunggu aje la..sbb nak dpt pahala jemaah yg lebih. Tp kan, lagi elok saya solat awal tp sorang2 ke, lambat skit tp jemaah? Tetiba plak kuar topik..hihihih